Tied Up - Pagan Style...

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Handfasting - A Celebration of Love

Have you ever thought about 'tying the knot'? or indeed where this quaint little phrase actually comes from?   Well it may come as no surprise but to 'tie the knot' comes from an olde, olde celtic ceremony called 'Hand Fasting'. The term 'handfasting' is thought to  have come from the old Norse term hand-festa "to strike a bargain by joining hands".

In short, handfasting is the ceremony to bind an emotional or loving commitment between two people where they exchange promises or vows - much the same as a conventional marriage ceremony does today. It has been in effect for hundreds of years (or more?) whereas today's marriage ceremony is actually a comparatively recent thing.

The chief difference is that  the participants hands are tied by a chord. Sometimes all the guests in attendance (as well as the officiator)  tie chords or ribbons about the joined hands to represent the union. This is the actual 'fasting' part of the ceremony, symbolizing the couple's commitment to on another, and the bond of their love.  However most of us will be more familiar with the use of rings to facilitate this... Another more notable difference is that there is  no 'til death do us part' clause in the vows - so this one's not just for life, it can last forever, so long as love remains.

Although this is originally a Celtic tradition, handfasting has been adopted into many New Age philosophies and is practiced (quietly) worldwide. There are two basic types of handfast:
The first would signify a betrothal or engagement, traditionally for 'a year and a day'. If all goes well, and after the year-and-a-day period, if the two intended lovers are still up for it, a second handfast binds the two forever - heart, mind, body and spirit - for as long as  love reigns supreme. The only thing that can undo a handfast is a lack of love.

Also - Traditionally (though this is more down to practicalities) handfasting ceremonies are conducted during the summer months as they tend to be held out of doors  - and in settings that are as close to nature as possible.   Many are held in 'special places' where decorations and tributes are added to enhance the festivities and mark the ritual...  The 'Happy Couple' can dress how they like as there is no formalisation of this event, but many choose to wear more flamboyant outfits with flowers adorning their garb and indeed themselves.

Some of these ceremonies are conducted in private by the couples themselves whilst others opt to have them more public with an officiator doing the honours... The 'officiator' is usually an elder in the  faith that the couple follow.. whether or not this person's 'authority' is recognised legally.. but that's the beauty of something like this. It's gratifying to know that there really is no 'wrong' way to handfast as it's a deeply personal thing. Having said that however, some basic elements are fairly common where words are said and gestures offered, acknowledging reverence for nature and the elements.

Ancient ancestors are invited and kindly spirits invoked... There are no restrictions or exclusions imposed upon those wishing to perform this ritual if that's what they want - and all that's required is a bond of true love... 

Some ceremonies also include the jumping over a broomstick whilst holding hands, that, or jumping over a small fire together at the end of the ceremony - symbolic of  the couple's 'leaping' in to their new life as one...  THEN the festivities follow for all who attend... traditional cakes, ales and such like with much revelry often lasting in to the night...

Handfasting pictures supplied by kind permission of Linda Sankey

There are 'provisions' however, for when the consenting adults fall out of love... When this happens (...and when doesn't it? I am so cynical sometimes!) a corresponding divorce ceremony called a 'handparting' is sometimes practiced, though this is thought to be o a modern innovation.

In a Wiccan handparting, the couple may jump backwards over the broom before parting hands.

Currently - and perhaps not surprisingly (!) - handfasting is a legal Pagan wedding ceremony in Scotland, but not in England, Wales or Ireland.
Time Enough for Love...
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